Alphas, Betas, Sigmas, Kings, Queens, And The Length Of A Man’s Fingers
There is only one type of man who can make a woman give up the bad boys, and be glad she did so. And that is the King archetype. However it is only the highest caliber of woman – the Queen – who can recognize this rare type and is in touch with herself enough to be with him.
It may be all based on finger length…. Science has discovered that the length of a man’s ring and index fingers are intrinsically linked to testosterone levels in the womb and early development. Testosterone levels in early youth determine which personality traits develop in males. There are two basic types that most men fall into:
1) The Alpha Male
The man with the ring finger longer than his index finger had a higher testosterone level as a child. This is your Alpha male. Ever since his early interactions with women as a young man, he was dominant – because the testosterone, and thus the natural dominant instinct, was there. Females instinctively responded strongly and positively to his “leading” behavior, and also instinctively recognize and are attracted to other visible alpha traits such as the strong jawline and upper body musculature, which are also linked to high testosterone. Thus the Alpha male is the guy who won at sports, learned very early on to lead women sexually, lost his virginity young and didn’t really have to make too much of an effort with girls because they make themselves highly available to him and will eagerly fuck him.
As a result, the “most alpha” of these guys grow up, if you can call it that, to become your player bad boys. They don’t have to try harder, so why should they? Immature women continually throw themselves at – and get hurt by – these guys. He is the guy she cries about because he is an asshole to her. And, not knowing any different, she then takes it upon herself to make it her objective to try to win this guy over and make him hers. Which never really happens – primarily because he has options – and there is always another woman who will have sex with him and is willing to give him a free pass on his bad behavior because he excites her.
This guy is generally a good lay because he is dominant, but all the other girls think so too, so she can’t keep him. As soon as a hotter female comes along, off he goes. Yet she would rather share him and compete with other women for him than have a Beta male all to herself. The Alpha may stick around for a while, if a woman is very attractive or otherwise pleasing to him, but as soon as a woman hits a certain age, he is all “enjoy your cats” and he is gone, with an new 18-25 year old chick in his crosshairs.
True “Alpha males” are, interestingly, despite their drive and aggression, very often not life’s high achievers. They quite literally think with their dicks – and would rather be out fucking – because they can – than at their desk building a business empire. They are often deadbeat fathers. A large percentage of men in jail are alphas. They are the tattooed bikers, immature “man children” and the lazy guys who never learned to be high achievers because they didn’t have to be in order to get laid and get by. Women found them irresistible and therefore made it easy for them to get sex whenever they want – and this generally dictates the pattern of their development and path through life.
2) The Beta Male
This man has a longer index finger than ring finger. He had low testosterone growing up. As a result, right from the early school playground establishment of the pecking order, he was not the dominant one. Right from the beginning he was pushed around by males and treated poorly by females, precisely because he did not hold the dominant frame and did not establish that things were going to proceed according to his terms. He became habitually submissive and thus did not learn dominant behavior, thus experiencing continual frustration and difficulty getting laid as a young man. He is the late virgin and attempts to compensate by being a nice guy. This is the guy who bores a woman in bed (if he even gets that far), but will take her shoe shopping AND carry the bags. He likes all her photos on Instagram and hopes (in vain) that she will give him attention in return. He will do anything she asks, in fact, because he hopes that by doing so, it will gain him access to the pussy.
It won’t.
She will call him for a ride home when the Alpha stood her up, he will race to her side, she will cry and tell him her problems, she will feel safe with him because he is non-threatening and validating; then she will brush aside his timid advances, if he even makes any, give him a peck on the cheek and say thank you darling, and then go to bed by herself and rub one out – thinking about the Alpha who ditched her.
Beta males also in their careers are not typically ultra high achievers. They may reach management positions and get good salaries on account of being steadfast, submissive and reliable – but they are generally always someone’s bitch. This also becomes self-fulfilling in their personal relationships; they are working too hard to please others to work on pleasing themselves, and so they tend to dress less stylishly than their alpha counterparts, seeking to play it safe and blend in rather than stand out, which further reinforces their Beta status in the sexual marketplace.
Beta males however make reliable parents. They are generally more caring, devoted and eager to please others around them, often going to great lengths to provide for their families. They are generally functional in all areas of their life except their sex life, which is continually frustrating both for them and, secretly, for their wives and girlfriends – who are either banging an Alpha on the side or wishing they were.
3) The Sigma Male
There is however a third archetype – the rarest of the three – the Sigma or “Lone Wolf” archetype. These men have index and ring fingers of identical length [note , I do not know if this is scientifically established, this is my untested theory but it seems to follow]. They express some dominant characteristics but are not the ones to start fights. They may however be the one to finish them, in unexpected and devastating fashion. Alphas often sense instinctively that the Sigma might be dangerous, and tend to pick softer targets to push around, leaving the Sigma alone.
Most people in fact leave the Sigma alone. He does not fit into the typical hierarchy and ‘pecking order’ – being neither physically dominant nor easily pushed around. This type is often not successful with the majority of women, but may form very strong and intimate connections with his rare counterparts in the female world… if he can but find them.
He intimidates and confuses most women, and the vast majority cannot figure out whether they want him or not, though introspective / alternative types may find him intriguing and mysterious. He is nothing like either the Alpha or the Beta, who by comparison are somewhat ‘basic’. He does not grab the girls by the hair and drag them off to his cave, but he will not be their bag-carrying bitch either. Most women are utterly puzzled by this ‘outsider’ guy and don’t know how to deal with him, so they push him away. As they have predominantly only experienced either Alpha or Beta men, who are easy to categorize and who fit into the patterns of game she has learned, the Sigma remains unfathomable to them and might as well be talking Martian. This infuriates him because he knows inside that he has many superior traits to either of the other types. Can nobody see it?
How he handles his loneliness and frustration is important, because it will dictate the kind of man he becomes.
The Sigma had the drive and enough testosterone not to be dominated, but was also not an early leader or sports captain and did not score easy, abundant wins with women in his early youth. People don’t readily understand him, and so he tends to withdraw, becoming an outsider or loner – reading books, becoming knowledgeable, creative, imaginative and skilled, thinking his own thoughts and learning to win in life through strategy rather than outright dominance. It is as though being neither driven mercilessly by testosterone nor being the submissive victim of the high testosterone of others, enables him to develop higher faculties and thus become something completely different to either of the other two main male archetypes. He may appear slightly androgynous, expressing both masculine and feminine characteristics in his demeanor and dress, and may appear to be balanced between logical and intuitive in his pursuits.
Fast forward to adulthood. The Sigma archetype, through his introverted pursuits and studies, has become a winning strategist in life, perhaps a sole proprietor of a business or an entrepreneur. He may become highly skilled and even ultra competent. But even if he achieves outward success, women still find him intimidating and confusing. He is used to living in his own world, which further develops his uniqueness and pushes him further out of touch with the majority. Most women have no deep experience of him or his world, they don’t know how to categorize him, certainly cannot manipulate him, and most of them are simply not on his level. So he gets rejected / blown out frequently.
This is tragic because this man would actually in many cases be the best choice of all for a woman – if she is not already irreparably damaged from Alpha abuse in her earlier years, and if she can put aside her childish acquisitiveness and roll on his level. The Sigma is more likely to be loyal – and not interested in one night stands; although he may have more than one woman in his life because the bonds he forms tend to be intense and long lasting. He is the guy who knows how to give her multiple orgasms, but will also make her breakfast. And it will be rosemary scrambled egg with French toast, served with a champagne mimosa and silver cutlery. He’s a high achiever after all…
The Sigma will take her shoe shopping too; however he will not carry her bags and will not follow her around like a puppy. He will drop her off at the mall and arrange to meet her in 45 mins, and he will be on time too, and he will expect her to do the same. Because Punctuality is the Politeness of Kings.
But most women are still foolishly chasing the Bad Boy Alpha and will not give the ultra-competent Sigma the time of day.
Thus the Sigma generally “unplugs” from the social and sexual marketplace – and in the modern post-feminist world, many Sigma males find themselves alone. They have become the lone wolf archetype, lonely Kings in their castle with everything except a Queen. This is because the Queen archetype, his natural consort, is also extremely rare. This is the woman who has it together on all levels and is not intimidated by the Sigma’s high intelligence and Mastery of his immediate environment. Rather, she delights in his heady world, finding him fascinating and enjoying his unusual traits. But the King also will not tolerate any Princess behavior or immaturity – and this vastly diminishes the number of options available to him… because most women in the modern world have been already damaged by The Deadly Isms and by the Alpha / beta dichotomy that has come to prevalence post-feminism, and which leaves them bitter, confused and possibly even broken by the age of 25-30.
This requires explanation. Most women are unhappy in the modern post-feminist world because their liberation, rather than giving them the life of their dreams, now has them caught between a rock and a hard place, forced to “choose” between Alphas and Betas. The Alpha will fuck her well but will break her heart, because he doesn’t give a shit, and post feminism / social media has given him even more options for conquest than ever before. The always-available Beta will provide for her at the drop of a hat, but will not make her insides tingle. So she remains unfulfilled on a deep level – and when women hit around 30-35, all of a sudden…. the Alphas start to go for younger women. She either locks down a provider Beta and grudgingly has sex with him, without much spark, or she ends up alone with her cats, wishing her bad boy would come back but also knowing he is bad news.
The immature woman is fixated on trying to capture an Alpha and turn him into the kind of man she wants him to be. This objectifying behavior is not healthy and sets up a dysfunctional pattern that is in many cases never resolved – because the Alpha will not change in any meaningful way except superficially (read: he learns to say the right words if it will get him more pussy, but otherwise continues not to give a shit). And all the while she chases this man she is off her center, and does not develop the meaningful skills and attributes that will turn her into a high achiever in her own right. She remains as a Princess and does not become a Queen.
Modern women, liberated by feminism but not necessarily wise in the ways of men, thus often resort to attempting the ‘best of both worlds’; juggling Alpha-on-the-side with a Beta husband – but this requires infidelity and a double life. Dishonesty is dysfunctional, feels rotten inside and it all usually ends badly with broken marriages, bitterness, confusion and blame, despite the fact that it seemed like a good idea at the time.
If a woman finds a Sigma, the best thing she could do is devote herself to him. If she would but have the courage to kneel at his feet and say “I’m yours, make me into what you want me to be” – the true King will not abuse her, but he will raise her up, putting her on her throne, taking extraordinary care of her and initiating her in the royal arts and the higher life that his many years of strategy and learning have prepared him for so well; as she too initiates him into her royal arts of love and life.
That’s the fairytale. However, sadly in most cases, the Alphas get to the women first; especially the hot / highly sexual ones, and this often ruins them. The technical term for such women is “Alpha widows”. Often these women did not have strong fathers threatening to kick the shit out of the bad boy if he tried to fuck his daughter. This may be more than a coincidence but that is a topic for another essay. Anyway the Alpha Widows may end up young mothers and / or damaged; either with PTSD from abuse, or with dark cravings which push them toward further abusers or even toward destructive practices such as prostitution, drug abuse and/or “dark BDSM” which is really a term for sexual abuse addiction.
Going down this path may leave her, finally, as “damaged goods”. The King archetype does not want damaged goods, does not wish to be Daddy to someone else’s children, and is not going to let his woman cheat on him either. He is smart enough to catch her in the act (another reason why he is intimidating to some women), and he will be furious too because she has dared to shatter his idealism. And he is certainly not fun when he is furious. The King will not put up with any crap. He won’t take it lying down and he has very high standards, higher than most people are used to being around.
There is a further aspect to this, which is that the Sigma archetype is the most likely to become, in the end, a highly skilled lover, owing not to innate assertiveness but to his “hacker” nature, his attentiveness to nuance and his desire to understand and master the inner workings of things. If he can achieve this, he stands a chance to take his woman far higher than any bad boy ever did, and he has the potential to provide a passionate yet nurturing love which can cure her, permanently, of her immature addiction to the bad boy, and fill her eyes with sparkle. He is also far more likely to be loyal and honest to those around him, but may be demanding as he expects people to meet him on his level. And there is, sadly, an awful lot of damaged goods out there now.
The Sigma archetype makes up the mavericks, the introverted startup business owners, edgy outsiders, high achievers, aloof Kings and lone wolves of the world. Watch out for the Sigma type. If positively aspected / “enlightened”, they may turn out as “Kings” – leaders of business, rock stars, high achievers and so on. This man takes personal responsibility for his circumstances in life and rises through industry as well as ingenuity.
However if these men become troubled, brooding, psychologically damaged and “endarkened”, they may develop “dark triad” characteristics – Machiavellianism, narcissism and psychopathy – becoming criminal masterminds, hackers, edgy lone wolf types, deviant and dangerous in their ambitions, while becoming expert manipulators and grand deceivers in relationships.
Wrap Up: Overcoming Your Traits
One might think as a result of this that our lives are predetermined. However, very much of dominant / submissive behavior is acquired early on and deeply ingrained, but not permanently so. Like many other deeply learned behaviors and responses, it can be changed. Hence we have game – which at its best is a deep dive into the psyche and the transformation of negative learned behaviors. Note also that these are archetypes and people may carry more than one aspect. There are many shades of grey.
A Beta can learn to be assertive through self-esteem training and to raise their testosterone levels through diet, exercise and other pursuits.
Similarly an Alpha can learn to shut the fuck up and actually listen for once and make an effort to please others rather than just himself, balancing things out.
As for the Sigma archetype – he should strive not to permit his loneliness to cause him to fall into troubled, brooding darkness; learning instead that most strategic of traits: Patience. He should have faith that if he stays the course, his Queen will come to him at last. He should make an effort not to become too abstracted into his thoughts, and remain relatable. He should also take care of himself physically, “live in his body” rather than just in his head, and avoid self-destructive pursuits.
For women – seek not to acquire men as objects in the same way that you acquire other things that have value to you. A partner is not a thing to be acquired in the way that you acquire an item you want at the mall; rather, a harmonious relationship with others and the formation of healthy bonds will arise from having a healthy relationship first of all with yourself, and from learning that you only get out of relationships what you put in. The Princess expects someone else to make her problems go away, whereas the Queen is able to be the agent of change. She also makes an adroit choice of partner; avoiding immature, abusive and weak men as she understands them to be a waste of time. Nurture yourself and put in your inner work, becoming the best version of yourself that you can be.
All of us are to some extent broken, as the saying goes – but we can all heal, and as Hemingway said, being broken is how the light gets in.
To find your Queen, you must first become a King – and to find your King, you must first become a Queen.
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